A Story I Heard
This week I just want to tell you a story I heard from a friend. My friend is a male, standing at about 6'3". He is pretty muscular, tone. You wouldn't want to start a fight with this kid, but that is probably the last thing he would ever do. He isn't a quiet fellow, but he is a peaceful fellow. He will tell you what he thinks but let you think what you think on subjective things, but on objective things, he isn't scared to tell you you are wrong. He has his quirks, but don't we all. He sort of acts awkward because he thinks peoples' reactions to him are funny. He has brown hair and brown eyes. His face looks as though a Greek, a Viking, and a bear produced viable offspring that can't grow facial hair. One day he was walking down a hiking trail in the middle of the summer. It was green and shady. The mosses were thick and the trees were tall. After a few miles, my friend stopped at a small stream to get a drink of water. He pulled out his hand pump water purifier and began to draw some fresh water out of the stream and into his Nalgene bottle.
As he was pumping his water filter, he heard some strange ruffling of the bushes behind him. He finished pumping the water and took a swig. It tasted kind of funny to him but he didn't pay any attention to it. The filter makes some crazy tastes sometimes. He got up and turned around to see what was behind the bushes. When he stood up, the trees sat down. and when he sat down again, they stood back up. 'What kind of crazy forest is this,' he thought. He crawled over to the bush to keep the trees from sitting down. As he crawled, the blades of grass were cheering him on. "Go guy," they chanted. He felt a sudden burst of energy and leaped from where he was twenty feet ahead of him to the bush. He could hear the chants faintly behind him. The chants began to increase in volume and the words that were once faint become very clear. "Go die," was their chant now. My friends energy left him. He sat there with a white face that began to melt into his hands. He looked up at the tall old man that was hiding behind the bushes. 'How did I not notice him before,' he thought.
The sod around him begins to wrap itself around my friend. the old man just stands there propped up against his staff and watches as my friend rolls down a hill in a carpet of sod. He rolls for what felt like days. Beatles and spiders began to crawl out of the sod and burrow into my friends blood stream. He said it tickled. I said "You're insane." He finally lands on the bottom of the hill. The sod falls off of him. He was lying there face down. He slowly began to look up off of the ground. The grass was the softest he had ever felt. His line of sight began on thick green stalks. As he lifted up his head, he followed the stalks to find himself in the middle of a vast sunflower field. He gets up feeling very relieved. He begins to walk. And walk. And walk. There is no end to this field. He suddenly found a hole in the ground. The hole was four feet wide and didn't seem to have a bottom to it. He looked around for something to throw in the hole to hear when it hit to gauge how deep it was. He couldn't find anything. Then a man came out of nowhere. She was just standing at the edge of the hole opposite of my friend. She looked at him, then down at the hole. Then she took off her head and threw it down the hole. My friend stood there staring at the headless girl for about five minutes and didn't hear her head hit anything. Then the rest of the girls body jumped in the hole. He followed her. He had nowhere else to go. To his surprise, the hole was very shallow. He landed in about three inches of orange water. There was a large mountain ahead of him and the headless girl stood on top of it. He heard a faint scream getting louder and louder. Then out of the clouds he saw a small dot was falling at a very fast speed. The dot landed on the headless girl. It was her head. He ran up the mountain. It took him six and a half seconds to get to the mountains peak. She looked at him and he at her. Then a large eagle came a picked them both up and brought them up higher and higher until they were in space. The eagle sat them on the moon and flew away until it became a constellation in the sky. They laid there for a few seconds until the moon began to shave violently. It split open and swallowed the both of them and the fell until they landed on my friends bed in his room.
"That was a crazy trip," the girl said.
"Tell me about it," my friend replied.
As he was pumping his water filter, he heard some strange ruffling of the bushes behind him. He finished pumping the water and took a swig. It tasted kind of funny to him but he didn't pay any attention to it. The filter makes some crazy tastes sometimes. He got up and turned around to see what was behind the bushes. When he stood up, the trees sat down. and when he sat down again, they stood back up. 'What kind of crazy forest is this,' he thought. He crawled over to the bush to keep the trees from sitting down. As he crawled, the blades of grass were cheering him on. "Go guy," they chanted. He felt a sudden burst of energy and leaped from where he was twenty feet ahead of him to the bush. He could hear the chants faintly behind him. The chants began to increase in volume and the words that were once faint become very clear. "Go die," was their chant now. My friends energy left him. He sat there with a white face that began to melt into his hands. He looked up at the tall old man that was hiding behind the bushes. 'How did I not notice him before,' he thought.
The sod around him begins to wrap itself around my friend. the old man just stands there propped up against his staff and watches as my friend rolls down a hill in a carpet of sod. He rolls for what felt like days. Beatles and spiders began to crawl out of the sod and burrow into my friends blood stream. He said it tickled. I said "You're insane." He finally lands on the bottom of the hill. The sod falls off of him. He was lying there face down. He slowly began to look up off of the ground. The grass was the softest he had ever felt. His line of sight began on thick green stalks. As he lifted up his head, he followed the stalks to find himself in the middle of a vast sunflower field. He gets up feeling very relieved. He begins to walk. And walk. And walk. There is no end to this field. He suddenly found a hole in the ground. The hole was four feet wide and didn't seem to have a bottom to it. He looked around for something to throw in the hole to hear when it hit to gauge how deep it was. He couldn't find anything. Then a man came out of nowhere. She was just standing at the edge of the hole opposite of my friend. She looked at him, then down at the hole. Then she took off her head and threw it down the hole. My friend stood there staring at the headless girl for about five minutes and didn't hear her head hit anything. Then the rest of the girls body jumped in the hole. He followed her. He had nowhere else to go. To his surprise, the hole was very shallow. He landed in about three inches of orange water. There was a large mountain ahead of him and the headless girl stood on top of it. He heard a faint scream getting louder and louder. Then out of the clouds he saw a small dot was falling at a very fast speed. The dot landed on the headless girl. It was her head. He ran up the mountain. It took him six and a half seconds to get to the mountains peak. She looked at him and he at her. Then a large eagle came a picked them both up and brought them up higher and higher until they were in space. The eagle sat them on the moon and flew away until it became a constellation in the sky. They laid there for a few seconds until the moon began to shave violently. It split open and swallowed the both of them and the fell until they landed on my friends bed in his room.
"That was a crazy trip," the girl said.
"Tell me about it," my friend replied.
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